Goodbye is Never Easy

Yesterday was the day I’d been dreading since Sadie hurt her leg (See post Tough Choices). We had to have her put down. The last couple of weeks she’d been getting stiffer and stiffer. She’d also started falling going up the stairs into the house. Sometime’s I’d have to carry her up. On Wednesday it seemed like both of her back legs were giving her problems. By Wednesday night she wouldn’t walk at all. We had to carry her everywhere. There was no doubt in our minds it was time. The farmer took her to the vet Thursday afternoon. I couldn’t make myself do it. I sort of feel like my heart has been ripped out.

If any of you have watched the movie or read the book “Marley and Me”, Sadie was our Marley. She was not a well-behaved dog by any stretch of the imagination. She jumped on company. She growled at strangers and other dogs. She tried to eat cats. She barked at shadows and thunder. When you threw a ball, she wouldn’t bring it back. She wouldn’t think twice about stealing food. Once she ate a piece of garlic bread right out of the farmer’s hand! I’ve found her drinking my milk, grape juice, and once she stole a whole pan of brownies off the kitchen counter. Funny the chocolate overdose didn’t kill her! Another time she ate 4 sweet corn cobs out of the garbage and in the morning I awoke to a mine field of doggie vomit laced with pieces of corn cobs.

No, Sadie couldn’t be described as a good dog, but she was my dog. She would crawl onto my lap (even though she was too big) and like my face. She could make me laugh, when I wanted to cry. She was my constant friend. I saw her more than my husband most days. She was there to greet me and hid under the table when I left.

I don’t know how it’s possible to miss an animal so much, they find a way into our hearts and don’t let go. I can’t believe the emptiness I felt today. Opening the bedroom door and no Sadie happy I was awake to feed her. No Sadie barking at the heifers while I did chores this morning. No Sadie sleeping on the couch and wagging her tail when I walked past. There’s no Sadie right now to lick the tears off my cheeks to let me know it’s going to be alright. There’s no Sadie and I hate it.

Sadie's last morning in the sunshine.

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6 Responses to Goodbye is Never Easy

  1. cb lasley says:

    I am so sorry. What a sweet face. I am crying with you. We have had to do this a few times in our 42 years. It never gets easier but we smile at remembrances now as I know you will in time.

  2. kbaran01 says:

    😦 i’m so sorry for your loss. People who dont have or like pets don’t get it but they truly are members of the family. When my golden, Misty died suddenly while I was at college, I was stunned and cried for days. We had bred our first golden, Madison, and Misty was the runt of the litter and should have died – she wasn’t breathing when she was born and it took my dad 5 minutes to get her breathing. She was my little baby from the age of 11 and I pretty much had to hand feed her for the first couple of weeks until she was strong enough to fend for herself with the other pups.

    again I hope that with time you and your family can heal…

    • Thank you, I’m sorry about your Misty. Goldens are such beautiful dogs. It’s nice to hear from other dog owners. Only another dog owner can truly know how this feels.

  3. So sorry you had to say goodbye to Sadie. I, too, am crying with you. We had my dog Friendly from the time I was four years old and had to put her to sleep when I was 21. I simply wasn’t ready for another dog until we got the puggles last year. That’s 17 years. I still miss Friendly, but I remember her fondly and she comes in my dreams, even now. Goodbye, Miss Sadie. You are missed and loved.

    • It’s nice to think after all those years I might still think of Sadie. I know I won’t be waiting long for a new friend, because we adopted a puppy yesterday. I’ll be writing a post about her soon. I guess I’m the type of person who can’t live without a furry friend.

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